A shower of rose petals? Really DWTS?

You all know by now how much I love the art of dancing.  Naturally, my DVR is very happy when Dancing with the “Stars” returns to TV each fall and spring.

However, Jake eeking out his 15 minutes of fame on yet another reality show is somewhat chachy to me.  But then I stop and think to myself, “Duh Lincee.  Jake is a chach.  It makes total sense.”

Then I see him with my favorite female pro Chelsea and think he’s darling!

Then they roll lame footage of him at an airport somewhere giving the ramp agent a rose while cha-cha-cha-ing.  Un-cool.

Let’s face it people.  Jake and I will always ebb and flow.  My “relationship” with him is like the scars on my knee — ugly but permanent.

Here are my thoughts from last night’s debut of Jake’s Viennese Waltz:

– Note to Jake:  Please for the love of all things sequined and feathery — refrain from doing the white man overbite.  It’s not funny.  We feel sorry for Chelsea when you do that.

– Why on God’s precious green earth is GIA in the audience?  Sitting next to Vienna of all people?  I’m going to have to assume that she used her connections to attract the attention of Maksim Chmerkovskiy and for that, I can’t really blame her.  You go Gia.

– Seriously DWTS?  Jake is dancing to Seal’s “Kiss From a Rose?”  I don’t know if that is seriously cheese-tastic or the most awesome thing ever.  This has to be the brain child of Our Host Chris Harrison.

Look!  It’s my sister’s prom date!  Doesn’t his pink bow tie and cummerbund look sweet with her dress? Hey wardrobe department… if you insist on bringing 1990 back, try a short mini skirt with knee socks for Chelsea and lots of denim with big white tennis shoes for Jake.  Think Cher Horowitz and Zack Morris.  It’s a much better look.

– It’s true that Jake actually danced the choreography okay.  But then we see him in the new knock-off of American Idol Celebudome as he hears his middle-of-the-pack score.  I had to fast forward the TV because he was jumping up and down not only like a girl, but a five-year-old girl at that.  Calm down rose boy.

That’s all I’ve got.  Did you guys watch?  Who are your early favorites?

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