Bachelor in Paradise recap: Did you know Tia likes Colton?

Hello fellow BIP-watchers! Entertainment Weekly was kind enough to let me recap the season 5 premiere of Bachelor in Paradise and I was happy to fill in for the night. Please know that this is a one-time deal. I will always love recapping the Bachelor franchise on my website and will never stop unless Our Host Chris Harrison personally asks me to.

No one has ever looked that good on an inflatable pink parrot. I bet he smells of sun, sand, surf, tequila, and adventure.

Photo By: ABC.com

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Hilary
Hilary

I was reading the EW recap like always and was getting very upset that this writer was plagiarizing you. I then scrolled up and saw that you had written it!

Florida Karen
Florida Karen

Great recap as usual!

Tara
Tara

Did anyone else notice that janky couch Jordan was lying on at the beginning? I almost threw up!

Rosa
Rosa

Nick is TERRIBLE! His language (beep beep) was awful and I hope he goes home first!! I’m loving Joe! He is so cute and awkward which makes him cuter!! I am so over Tia! The whole gang up on Colton thing was stupid too. Too much drama for the 2nd day in Paradise. Lastly, who from Arie’s season ISN’T in Paradise?? My goodness!

Shannon
Shannon

I agree Rosa! Nick seems like he’s always drunk, and yes grocery store Joe is so cute!

Cassie
Cassie

I really hope Grocery Joe can keep it classy but also not fall in love so that ABC can cast him as The Bachelor. He is so stinkn hot/adorable, I can’t take it! He would make the best Bachelor EVER.

delyla
delyla

Unfortunately Chris Harrison already shot that down. He says Joe is too quiet and wouldn’t make a good bachelor.