Bachelor Jake: Episode Five

Jake:  “It’s not about sex appeal.  It’s about flexibility.  See how Ali straddles me so comfortably in the middle of a meadow?”

OHCH:  “Jake.  Buddy.  You can’t say that on prime time TV.  This isn’t cable.”

Jake:  “Right.  Sorry.”

OHCH:  “Take two.”

Jake: “It’s not about sex appeal.  It’s about being smoking hot and coming to my room with a bottle of wine and admitting you aren’t wearing any panties.”

OHCH:  “Dude.  You can’t say that either.  Think wings of love and try again.  Take three.”

Jake:  “It’s not about sex appeal.  It’s about heart appeal.”

OHCH:  “Totally chachtastic.  I think we have a winner.  We needed something with extra cheese so Lincee would have an amazing title for her blog tomorrow.  It will be the new catch phrase that sweeps the nation!  Good job Jake!”

Recap will be up LATER this afternoon as soon as I figure out what in the world I can write about after sitting through the most boring episode to date.

Wish me luck!

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