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Bachelor Sean Recap: Silly Games

Tuesday, February 26, 2013 @ 05:02 PM
Author: Lincee

Within moments of the opening montage, we follow Sean randomly walking around various settings in Thailand as he ticks through the list of remaining bachelorettes. Standing on the bow of a boat, we are reminded that Catherine is weird and goofy, but in a good way. When wandering the streets in an ice blue tank top and his infamous red shorts, Sean comments on AshLee’s huge, compassionate heart. And while rocking back and forth lazily in a hammock, Sean admits that Lindsay has grown in terms of her maturity over the past several weeks, even though her voice still sounds like an adolescent girl.

Sean realizes that since we’re coming into the home stretch, it’s time to see what these girls are made of. And the best way to do that is by testing their willingness to be adventurous in spirit, as well as their unwillingness to get busy in the fantasy suite. Sean wants his wife to be his best friend, outgoing and to ultimately trust him with her life. But before anything else, he wants that wife to be a lady.

SIMPLE DISCLAIMER
The following information you are about to read is of personal opinion. However, if you or someone you linked on Twitter happen to personally know, sort of know, is friends with the nail stylist or bowing instructor of someone who is obsessed with the fictional life and devastating death of Matthew Crawley like me and looks exactly like one of the contestants on the show…none of this is personal and I’m sure they are all lovely people.

Lindsay
Once again, Sean looks as if he’s about spend the day in right field tossing back a few hot dogs and pitchers of beer, compared to Lindsay’s posh yet totally casual garden grounds bridesmaid luncheon outfit. They squish into a pimped out version of a Thai pedicab. Kudos to that little guy for having the leg power to schlep Sean’s massive body mass around Si Kao.

Sean and Lindsay spend the day at a local produce market. They begin at the poultry tent where they pet florescent-colored baby chicks before high fiving each other with the claws of a dead chicken. Best date ever! Sean purposely tests Lindsay’s ability to try something new by casually leading her to the insect tent and suggesting they taste test a sampling of the merchant’s offerings. Lindsay plasters on a smile and with as much enthusiasm as she can muster, she accepts the plump slug that has been conveniently speared onto a skewer. Instead of swallowing it whole, you can tell she bit into the flesh due to the mortified look on her face. Rookie mistake. She chugs her pineapple cocktail and prematurely celebrates her success in consuming the larvae when Sean suggests they try the over-sized roach. Crunchy!

As Lindsay begins to turn a fierce shade of green, Sean decides that she has proven herself and he takes her to the beach so they can feed a family of monkeys. Sean wears the dorktastic swim suit he purchased next to the invertebrate tent back at the market and Lindsay wears a tiny string bikini that comes incredibly close to requiring ABC modesty patches or blurring when she bends over to feed the hyper primates squealing for another round of grapes. They take a moment to fine dine on a few courses of pig snout and spider eggs as the sun sets over Monkey Beach. She tells him something that I don’t understand because I’m not fluent in baby talk. My friend Carrie was able to decipher after we rewound. Let the record show that Carrie works daily with youths. Anyway, using context clues coupled with Carrie’s loose translation, I can assume that it was in the general “you’re super neat” vicinity since Sean responds by sticking his tongue down her throat.

Later Lindsay wears her best lingerie at dinner and is confused why Magic Kingdom’s Spectromagic Main Street Electrical Parade floats are in Thailand, but decides it makes sense since Disney owns ABC and she should just go with the flow. A pretty floral pattern has been outlined by millions of candles on the ground. You know the ABC Intern was sweating bullets when the Thai dancers came out to perform for our dynamic duo. One wrong turn in choreography and the whole place goes up in smoke! MAN YOUR FIRE EXTINGUISHER INTERN!

Sean: “Will you dance for me like that later?”
Lincee: “You’re not in the fantasy suite Sean. Calm down.”
Lindsay: “Is it gross that I want that chick to scoop out some ice cream with her fingernails?”

Lindsay shares that she is totally open to moving to Dallas. Upon hearing this, Sean gives her the forego card and the fantasy suite key. He lets her know that there will be absolutely no hanky panky going on, so she puts on some sweats over her negligee and settles in for a long night of conversation in an octave that sits right at the level of your typical first grader.

AshLee
As AshLee gives a small, yet thorough dissertation about the wonder that is Sean, I become both distracted and obsessed with figuring out what her necklace says. It looks like “AshLee” and then I think it says “Respect” but then change my mind, convinced it says “Gypsy.” After several pauses of the DVR, one Google search and a few confirmations from those watching the show with me, I am happy to report that the necklace reads “gypset,” which is a made up word that roughly translates to: “having an unconventional and Bohemian approach to life.” I’ve learned that in order to be a gypset, you have to play the ukulele or accordion, prefer vacationing in a teepee, reject all forms of currency, drink absinthe and constantly wish you had been a young adult in the 70s.

From our viewpoint, it’s pretty much the opposite of what AshLee’s demeanor has been the entire show, but I have to give her props for embracing her nomadic motto by hanging on to the shoulders of her “adventurous” bachelor as they dog paddle their way through a scary cave.

Sean: “I just need to see if AshLee can let go of her fears and trust me. I really hope that she proves herself by letting me take control.”

My opinion? It’s kind of hard to trust you when you’re being a total jackhole, Sean. Perhaps you could give her a little encouragement that you’re not going to let rabid bats eat her face off? Or you’ll throw your body on top of her should a stalactite fall from above causing her eye socket to be impaled? PS: shouting an explicative when some unknown cave dweller brushes up against your leg does not promote an atmosphere of control and trust. She was definitely a bigger gypsetter than YOU.

It’s a good thing that private beach was so cool on the other side, or I would have had some words with our resident bachelor. Of course, this leads to many metaphors for their relationship. Just pick one that has to do with trust, taking risks, blah, blah, blah. AshLee begins monologging about Sean’s ability to make her feel whole, her love for this man and that two human beings couldn’t belong together more than they.

Preach it gypset!

At dinner, AshLee tells Sean for the hundredth time that they were made for each other and then she describes in great detail the exact engagement ring along with her finger size because she knows the visit to Uncle Neil will be in the next few days. Do you hear that? It’s the final nail being hammered into her coffin.

It’s time to purchase a one-way ticket to Moulin Rouge my friend. Tell Christian I said I think he’s hot and he can gift me a song any time he wants.

Catherine
At first, I thought Catherine was wearing a clunky sports bra under her island dress, but it was just her swimsuit. It distracted me so much that I barely noticed Sean pretend to have no idea she was about to jump on his back with a surprise hello. Sean’s time with Catherine was completely different from Lindsay and AshLee. It was mellow, casual and full of conversation. Bonus for us…Catherine stood on the bow of the bow and announced she was Queen of the World! Thank you for that Leo.

They sit down for some non-eye-contact quality time and discuss how she’s ready to make the trek from Seattle to Dallas because they are MFEO. Catherine admits that she was sad after her home town dates because her evil sisters totally threw her under the bus and they have NO idea what she wants in life because she shares her inner most secret thoughts with her best friend who is married and that makes everything okay. I didn’t follow it either.

However, I may have stood up and cheered when they both did a back flip off of the boat into the ocean. Catherine reminds him that she can be serious, but he assures her that her silly and weird side is something that he finds extremely attractive. To prove it, he sticks his tongue down her throat as he pushes her up against the mast in the middle of a rain storm. Somewhere in a race track bar in Arizona, Arie knew his protege would be okay.

At dinner, Sean asks Catherine where she will be in five years. She answers that they will be married, probably with a kid, and very happy. Then she trumps the fantasy card before it’s even mentioned, telling Sean that she’s nervous because she doesn’t want people watching to think she’s a hooch. Sean loves this and assures her that there will be nothing going on other than some heavy making out in a hot tub. He hands her the forgo card and by the writing and the scratch out (Dear Des Catherine), clearly this has not been written by Harrison.

They don’t pay me to write about the details people. They don’t pay me at all. GYPSET FOREVER!

Catherine ends the night by admitting that she never was one to get the good looking guy because she’s always been told that she’s on the chunky side. Something tells me her wicked sisters are the culprits of this little lie.

Catherine: “I’ve never been in a bathing suit more in my life than on this trip.”
Lincee: “Best sentence EVER on this show.”
Sean: “You’re smokin’ hot.”
Lincee: “Good answer.”

THIS JUST IN! EVERYONE. REMAIN CALM. OUR HOST CHRIS HARRISON HAS SOMETHING VERY IMPORTANT TO SAY. WILL IT BE THE ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE NEXT BACHELORETTE? IS OUR HOST DATING SOMEONE? HAS THE FEED BEEN LOST IN THE EDITING ROOM AND HARRISON MUST IMPROV HIS WAY THROUGH THE NEXT 45 MINUTES? YES PLEASE!

No. It’s a shameless plug for “Oz, the Great and Powerful” brought to you by three very Stepford looking witches in the forms of Jen Lindley, Jackie from That 70s Show and the gorgeous brunette who married to my favorite 007.

Rose Ceremony
Sean confesses to Chris Harrison that he knows who he is sending home. Chris looks like a hobbit sitting next to Sean, but that’s neither here nor there because they both look amazing in the tunics and linen pants from Harrison’s island collection of his menswear line. It’s time to bust out the video messages from the ladies. Sean’s facial expressions begin to waiver.

Lindsay talks about her wedding dress entry and giggles a lot. Catherine shares that she’s falling in love. And AshLee rounds things out by telling Sean (between literal melt downs) that because of him, she is no longer broken.

Sean takes a moment to hurl and then heads out to meet the waiting ladies. He quickly gives Lindsay a rose then forces us wait a good 30 seconds before ripping the Band-Aid and announcing Catherine’s name.

AshLee’s eyes turn in to daggers as she stares him down before briskly walking to her waiting rejection SUV.

Catherine: “She didn’t say goodbye to us.”
Lindsay: “She’s pissed.”
Lincee: “Thank you Captain Obvious.”

She commands, “DON’T FOLLOW ME!” but he trudges behind anyway, begging her to hear his side of the story. After using the word “intense” he wraps up his speech by letting Ash know that he thinks the world of her. Way to let her down easy, Sean! AshLee doesn’t speak a word until the vehicle is in motion, several cocktails are poured and the ABC Psychotherapist pulls a sound bite out of her. “This wasn’t a silly little game to me.” She instructs the driver to pull over at the chicken tent at the market to see if anyone knows where she can buy a bunny to boil.

J.K. everyone. J.K.

I have to admit that Sean did look a little guilty, and by AshLee’s reaction, one could assume that he told her things that turned out to not be true. On the other hand, describing someone as “intense” may mean that our resident bachelor is looking for a little bit of silly in his life. If I had to guess, I’d say it was more of the back flip off a boat silly than a wedding dress skit silly.

Team Catherine.

All about the shame, not the fame,

Lincee

91 Responses to “Bachelor Sean Recap: Silly Games”

  1. Monica says:

    Haha! The baby talk comment is spot on! Funny stuff! :)

  2. TAGNJ says:

    I think that AshLee’s statement about not being there for fun and games is pretty much exactly why she was let go. She seemed nice and like a good person but kind of dull and not fun-loving. She also acted older than Sean (not sure of their actual ages).

    I like Catherine!

  3. Lyn in Denver says:

    Team Catherine for Bachelorette!

  4. Lyn in Denver says:

    Ashlee has every right to be intense. Hopefully, she’ll find someone trustworthy who brings out her silly. Poor woman was on the wrong show. Ashlee on Survivor = Brilliant television.

  5. Tina says:

    Boiling bunny comment is right on! That’s what I thought, too .. AshLee went from sweet sap to wicked-eyed scorned woman in 0 to 60. She really looked crazed in that limo. Not that I don’t think someone deserves to deck our pious Bachelor .. I do. But I wouldn’t walk down any dark alleys, dude ..

  6. nancy says:

    Great one, Lincee – And was that a Sleepless in Seattle reference in there? Love it! I don’t think Sean and Catherine are quite as MFEO as Sam and Annie, though ; )

  7. Kristin says:

    “Preach it Gypset!”

    Team Catherine too.

    I agree with Sean that Ashlee is “intense”, but I do hope he gave her a little more explanation than that. I said Dez wasn’t good at communicating, but neither is he!! He told all the girls the same thing, in the same way! They should all be pissed! (That’s on top of having to prove their love!) I used to like Sean, but have lost respect.

  8. Zandi says:

    i’m TEAM CATHERINE also!! i love that she’s goofy and not afraid to be herself…..and that she’s gorgeous but doesn’t even realize it. pack up the sippy cups lindsay, you’re heading home!

  9. Whoo Will It Be? says:

    Great recap Lincee! You are so right about OHCH getting us excited in the middle of the show, but let us down with the Oz commercial. Shameless plug!

    My bet is the letter is from Sean’s mom and the producers thought that would be a fantastic way to throw us off and think one of the ladies is going to reject him.

    I was shocked that Sean let AshLee go, but I can certainly see that if he wanted a carefree girl that she wasn’t the right fit. I just wish he hadn’t led her on so much expecially with her past. Carefree doesn’t always give you a wife though Sean. I haven’t seen the chemistry with Catherine, but I really hope he doesn’t pick Lindsay. Her caked on eye makeup and baby talk drive me crazy!

    My favorite part of the recap was: “She tells him something that I don’t understand because I’m not fluent in baby talk. My friend Carrie was able to decipher after we rewound. Let the record show that Carrie works daily with youths. Anyway, using context clues coupled with Carrie’s loose translation, I can assume that it was in the general “you’re super neat” vicinity since Sean responds by sticking his tongue down her throat.” LOL

    My favorite parts of the entire season have been the last two minutes. That seems to be when they show us the “real” conversations. Loved that Catherine won the multiplication game!

  10. Lisabeth says:

    “Somewhere in a race track bar in Arizona, Arie knew his protege would be okay.” Well done Lincee!

  11. SusieQ says:

    We said AshLee was about to go boil a bunny, too!
    And our Bachelor-watching group tried to read her necklace on their date. We couldn’t quite get it, so we decided it must say “Mrs. Sean Lowe”.

  12. Kristin says:

    “Kudos to that little guy for having the leg power to schlep Sean’s massive body mass around Si Kao.”

    I kind of thought that when Sean was torn up about sending AshLee home that he did a sitting Mesnick.

    Yes, Team Catherine!

  13. Kristin says:

    Oh yeah! And totally concur about the cave-swimming part! I agree with you 100%.

  14. Heather says:

    Team Catherine! She is so sweet and funny and genuine! Loved the multiplication game! Amen for a real woman! I thought AshLee was going psycho for a few weeks now. You can’t depend on a man to “fix” you. Heal yourself before you get in a relationship AshLee! Also, was that the same secret pool that Ames went to with Build-a-Bear? Thanks Lincee!

  15. Juno says:

    When Catherine and Sean were on the boat and she goes “I’m the queen of the world!” it reminded me of Ashley and Ames’ similar date, with one of the best lines in Bachelor/ette history: Ashley: It’s just like the Titanic! Ames: Let’s hope not.

    I miss Ames :(

  16. meg says:

    I love these recaps so much because, no matter what kind of day I’ve had, I laugh out loud at least 2 or 3 times. Am thoroughly enjoying the Lindsay ripping because she is like OMG so queer you guys!
    Lincee, I think “monologging” is either spelled incorrectly or not even a word – just sayin.

  17. BigRed says:

    Does Sean ever REALLY stick his tongue down anyone’s throat?? That’s really hard to do when you only kiss their upper lip area….and it’s not really kissing either. More like pecking.

  18. TanyaT. says:

    Spectromagic! I die.

  19. Shopgirl says:

    Lincee, you, too, can get your very own Gypset necklace… http://thesuburbandiary.com/2013/02/25/ashlee-frazier-gypset-gold-necklace/

    And I must admit I was following half-heartedly, so I don’t know the answer to this, but who was Sean calling his “best friend?” I’m assuming he’s going to propose that one…

  20. Casey says:

    Lindsay’s baby talk! It’s driving me crazy. Did anyone else notice that she pouts her lips out when talking – especially the word “serious” … like she just can’t BEAR to say “serious” in a human voice. “Oh Seawn I’m having sewious feewings fow you….” GAHD please don’t pick her!

    And AshLee said it herself, it wasn’t about having fun for her. Well, honey, maybe some people want to have fun with the people they’re going to spend the rest of their lives with? I know I do!

  21. Lauren says:

    Why do they always refer to Sean as “this man”? I love this man, I’m crazy about this man, I hope I don’t get herpes from this man. Nobody says that in real life! Nobody acts like these people in real life! Arghhhh!!!!! I can tell its the end of the season because I hate them all so much!!!!

  22. renee says:

    I thought Sean was doing the Mesnick too, first when he let Des go, and now with Ashlee, but I really think he is praying. I think he does this before he hands out roses too.

  23. Katie says:

    Thank you, thank you for the Sleepless in Seattle reference. Clearly it is you and OHCH that are MFEO!

  24. Jill says:

    I find it interesting that Sean almost said the same thing to AshLee as Emily said to him at his exit – “I really thought you were the one.”
    Also, why did she not get the respect of avoiding the rose ceremony and letting her go early like he did some of the other girls? I like Sean but don’t think he handled this one well and in keeping with his desire to be respectful to the women.
    I was pulling for AshLee but it was obvious he was wanting a carefree, fun loving type. AshLee sealed her fate with the constant “You are perfect for me.” That’s a lot of pressure! No one is perfect and I sure hope she finds the one and only relationship in Christ – who will never leave her or forsake her. Until that part of her heart is filled, men (and people in general) will continue to fall short and she will be let down and disappointed.

    Team Catherine -at this point.

  25. Heather says:

    Sean will choose Lindsay because she’s a safe pick. He should propose to Catherine, but i don’t think he has the guts…i hope i’m wrong.
    Team Catherine.

  26. Amanda says:

    My watch party was obsessed with figuring out what AshLee’s necklace said. I’m glad we weren’t the only ones! And obviously we weren’t the only ones too Google “gypset” either! I love this club.

  27. Karen says:

    Lincee, you are so damn funny! LOVED the “Sleepless” and “Fatal Attraction” references. AshLee transformed into something really creepy right before our eyes!

    I really should wash my makeup off before reading your blog. My mascara is running from laughing so hard!

  28. Lincee says:

    Thanks for the comments everyone!

    Meg, I used the term monologging from The Incredibles because I love that term. I think it’s correctly spelled monologuing, but that look more mis-spelled than monologging so I chose monologging. Funny. This entire comment is a monolog.

  29. AmyA says:

    OMG. Just when I think I’ve read my favorite recap, you write another! You nailed every thought I was thinking, but couldn’t find words to express! Thank you for solving the necklace mystery for me. It really reminded me of one of my name I had in the fourth grade….that turned my skin green!

    For a couple of episodes I had AshLee pegged as the obvious choice, so I can believe he was truthful when he said the same to her upon exit.

    TEAM CATHERINE. I adore her (for him). I pick Lindsay as the next Bach’ette.

    Can’t wait till WTA. I hope AshLee and Tierrable go round and round again!

  30. Trish in Portland says:

    Sean deserves Lindsay. I would not want Catherine to waste her life on Mr Cliche a Minute. She can do MUCH MUCH better. AshLee – ohboy – Sean’s face crumbled as she saddled him with the entire responsibility of her sanity in that video. His not being able to sense this gap in her psyche speaks to his limited brain power. He is so dull. Jef for next Bach! (And YAY for talented Lincee! Your smart and funny writing has been sweet at the end of a long day at work.)

  31. Charlotte says:

    I was laughing maniacally during AshLee’s video sob-fest because the look of panic on Sean’s face was priceless! I knew then who was going home- he looked like he was alternating between crying and vomiting. I really don’t see ever-lasting love between Sean and either of the girls. But, still, the crescendo and subsequent crash-and-burn after the People magazine cover is what it’s all about.

    Lincee, LOVE your blog!

  32. It's only a game! says:

    Okay, so I want to know…… did AshLee say “this man” more than Lindsay said “amazing” ?!
    I felt deja vu when Sean and Catherine were talking about how they totally “get” each other. Didn’t Emily and Jef with one f say the same thing about each other. Of course, maybe Sean remembered the script from that episode and just went with it rather than say something original or authentic.

  33. It's only a game! says:

    Sean sure took his sweet time in handing out the last rose. If I was on the show, I would have wanted to yell, “for gods sake , say the fricking name already!” Yeah, I know, he needed to take his time for the dramatic effect.
    Also, didn’t Emily and One F talk about how they were both nerds( or did they say geeks?) and how they liked that about each other just like Sean and Catherine’s conversation.

  34. r says:

    Lincee- what I would do to be part of your viewing party. It sounds like a blast!!! The baby talk references make the baby talking almost bearable!! TEAM CATHERINE!!

    Love the references about Catherine’s evil sisters! ahaha!!! And yes- Sean’s face of dread was priceless! Hilarious!!! He looked skerd!!!

  35. zum says:

    Loved how Sean’s nostrils flared up due to the climax of sending AshLee home. Boy did he look scared! LOL!!! His face was priceless!!!

  36. Christy says:

    I don’t know, I’m just thinking that if you have a deep-seated fear of rejection born out of your experiences in the foster-care system, maybe going on The Bachelor isn’t the best choice for your emotional well-being.

    I thought it would be Lindsay, but now I think he’ll choose Catherine. It kind of reminds me of Andy Baldwin and Tessa in the “All-American dude chooses slightly exotic dark horse” sense. Also in the sense that I can’t see it working out.

  37. Bea says:

    AshLee’s been worrying me for a while….most recently from last episode’s giddy description of her romp in the sand with Sean to her parents at the dinner table. She seems so mature, and yet so inexperienced with dating and boundaries. I completely agree with some of the comments on here that no man can “fix” you. She was attributing all her self-therapy of “letting go” toward Sean, but I think will come to realize that she allowed herself to reach a point of trust in another human that she will need to do again and again in life to form meaningful relationships. I think her reaction to rejection in the end spoke volumes. She wasn’t so much in love with Sean, but the idea of Sean and the idea of being in love. Can you imagine her reaction in marriage of Sean did something that fell short of her vision for him?

    And I like him best with Catherine. After seeing her sisters run her under the bus (then back it up back over her) in hometowns, I highly suspect they were the one’s making jokes about her being fat over the years. It says a lot that she admitted she doesn’t tell them much about her relationships because they would get super jealous of her and create drama.

  38. Love From Utah says:

    At my watch party last night we all huddled around the TV trying to decipher AshLee’s necklace. When nobody could make it out, I said “Don’t worry. ‘I Hate Green Beans’ will be ALL over this tomorrow.”

    Lincee: 1, AshLee’s Necklace: 0

  39. 77%quality says:

    As an openly gay man I watch this show regular, many gay men love this show. I really liked Ashlee, what a sweetheart she is. The other two girls left are just like teenagers in puppy love, I see nothing solid or long term with the Lindsey or Cath… Ashley is true wife material. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 years ( we wanted to marry, but it is illegal in my state), and he has many qualities that Ashlee has…that is what makes long term commitments. Ashlee is very level headed, very committed, she is very pretty, relationship oriented, she is for sure long term! She is like the girl from the movie Notebook, who will love her partner till the end. if I was strait and the Bachelor she would have been my F1.

  40. Lauretta says:

    “Sean realizes that since we’re coming into the home stretch, it’s time to see what these girls are made of. And the best way to do that is by testing their willingness to be adventurous in spirit, as well as their unwillingness to get busy in the fantasy suite. Sean wants his wife to be his best friend, outgoing and to ultimately trust him with her life. But before anything else, he wants that wife to be a lady.”

    My favorite part… Thank you Lincee, this recap was really great!

    However, I did not know that Matthew Crawley dies! :( They do not air DA here in the triangle area of NC, so I just watched the 2nd season (purchased), about to start the 3rd (Netflix). I agree with whoever suggested you recap DA! Not that you need more unpaid work to do… :)

    Team: Go find a girl on your own! Neither of these will work. I liked Lesley, but she’s too smart for him. Come to think of it, Lindsay is about his brain speed. THAT’s why she ate the bugs I guess.

  41. Saggleo says:

    Sooo many good things to quote!!! Awesome reacap! I agree – Team Catherine!!!

  42. Heather says:

    I agree, Lincee, Sean’s date with Catherine was very different from the other girls. All he ever talks about with Lindsay is how much fun they have together. Ashlee was just always super intense and put way too many expectations on Sean by expecting him to fix her. With Catherine, Sean has conversations of real depth.

    It was pretty obvious the whole episode he was going to send Ashlee home. I don’t think he gave her a good enough explanation though before she left. I felt like he continued to lead her on by saying he thought it would be her. Just tell her you weren’t feelin’ it man, don’t sugarcoat it! It will be better for her in the long run. I really like Sean, but I’m starting to get annoyed with him saying the same stuff to each girl. He must just not know what else to say to them.

    Team Catherine for sure, I don’t see him picking Lindsay. I’m not sure it will work with Catherine permanently, but they have the most real and cute relationship at this point. I think he already knows he’s going to pick her, and just says the typical “I’m so confused, I don’t know who to pick!” lines for good tv.

  43. LASS says:

    Awesome recap as always! Couldn’t get through my Tuesday w/o your wit!

  44. Leigh says:

    Laurette

    I watch DA in the Triangle – on PBS.. on TWC.

    Team Catherine.. these recaps make my week.

  45. Juno says:

    I totally agree with the comment that Sean and Catherine are a lot like Andy Baldwin and Tessa. I think that was a real relationship that didn’t last because Andy was more focused on his Navy career and philanthropic activities than he was on really settling down – he’s still not married.

    On the other hand, I think Sean really does want to be married and will be within a very short time, either to the one he picks on this show, or someone he meets soon after. Team Catherine!

  46. Chris says:

    Am I the only one who heard “Sea Cow” for Si Kao?

  47. Wesley's says:

    I know a lot of people are Team Cath but I just see him with Lindsay. He just seems extremely comfortable with her and gaga over her.

    Re: How Sean speaks of Catherine. One thing that bugs me was this…if anyone ever tried to refer to my quirkiness as “weird”, it would be a total turn off to me. Referring to anything I do as weird would just not be okay for some reason. Maybe its a cultural thing because weird is certainly more acceptable these days than ever before. Tch.

    Lindsay: “Is it gross that I want that chick to scoop out some ice cream with her fingernails?” haha.

  48. Laurel says:

    He’s going to pull a different kind of Mesnick.

    He’ll pick Catherine because he’s fascinated with her but change his mind months later and go back to Lindsay whom he’s comfortable with.

  49. Grace says:

    Don’t say “soulmates” on this show.
    Save that for the ABC wedding special of you and the Bachelor where OHCH pronounces you as such mates.

  50. Grace says:

    p.s. Ashlee said “soulmates”… though Lindsay may have too though I can’t understand baby prattle either

  51. ILG says:

    @Jill – YES! Exactly my thoughts! No man will ever heal her or complete her, only God will. Until she pursues that from Him, she’ll just hurt herself by looking for that fulfillment in men.

    And I do really hope that he explained more to AshLee than what they showed. I hope he better explained why they wouldn’t work and it was just edited out. But it sounds like she didn’t want to hear it.

    I really hope he picks Catherine but am afraid that he’ll pick Lindsay because he seemed to reciprocate everything she said to him. He also said she could be his best friend multiple times.

  52. Tim says:

    I have been Team Des from day 1. I still think he made a mistake. So you don’t like the brother..who cares? Not going to marry the brother. I keep hoping the note from whoever at the end is from Des and he reconsiders her, but is probably from Seans Mom begging him not to choose anyone. I am sure ABC set that up to be something it isn’t, but I watched that and thought ‘Well, no wonder he isn’t married yet. Mommy doesn’t want to lose him to another girl.’

    I like both girls, and see more stability with Lindsay than Catherine, but I think he really does care for Catherine too.

    Did I mention Des is who I would pick? Ten times over? Ok, just making sure. My final three would have been Des, the redhead he ditched for Teirraist, and the Washington DC girl. Final two of DC girl and Des. Des stole my (tv watching) heart right away. Tierra with her Tammy Faye lashes never would have made it to day two.

    Des needs to pay someone to beat the crap out of her brother. I am still irritated.

  53. Tim says:

    One more thing..Christy has it right. Fear of rejection and “The Bachelor” is not exactly a wise decision.

    We need Facebook ‘Thumbs up’ buttons for posts we love!

  54. ksvb says:

    @ Lauren “I can tell its the end of the season because I hate them all so much!!!!” – well said, I’m so with you.

    Also whoever said their husband thought the necklace said “broken” totally made me laugh out loud!

    Could barely stand to watch Lindsay pout her way through trying to say I Love You. So forced and contrived. I hate how they have to say it and Sean can’t. Lincee, glad you noticed Catherine’s giant bikini top as well…it was a strange contrast to the teeny tiny purple bottom.

  55. kt says:

    Although Des is now a likely candidate for the next Bachelorette, I would love it if ABC went with someone a little different – Lesley and Sarah are the two that I like. Lesley would just need coaching about looking guys in the eye, and Sarah would need a little voice work. Both of these women seem smart and interesting to me.

  56. ksvb says:

    Also did anyone else find it weird that Catherine was all upset when Lesley was kicked off and then all surprised when AshLee didn’t say goodbye? Seems she cares more about the other girls than Sean sometimes.

  57. alyce says:

    the kissing on the boat in the rain with catherine was the grossest kissing i’ve ever seen sean perpetrate.

    i’ve been team catherine since the first night when i pegged her as being at least partially filipina.

  58. Lauretta says:

    Thanks Leigh, I called TWC and discovered that PBS is on channel 4 which is not on my guide – I have to ‘program’ it in.

    I really hope all these girls find happiness somewhere. It amazes me when they sob in the outgoing limo, ‘Now what am I going to do with my life?’ What did they do before?

    I agree that Lesley would make a good Bachelorette; she wouldn’t put up with any ‘stuff.’

    And definitely Team Ames for Bachelor (if he’s still swinging that way:)

  59. Kim says:

    Lincee, YOU ROCK! I am and have been team Catherine for a while now…she seemed the most normal and not there for the show of things. She looks pretty with and without make-up.

    I really wish they would have the “WTA” and Final Rose next week. I am ready for this season to be done.

  60. Susie says:

    I dont think Sean’s relationship with either of these girls will stand the test of time. Lindsey is just too young and immature and I think Catherine came on the show for the adventure and to do something different. Sean doesnt seem to know what he wants and lets face it, just like Emily, why does someone who appears to have it all (attractive, nice, good family, comfortable life) need to come on a show like this to find someone???

  61. Patty says:

    Great recap as always Lincee!

    Am I the only one thinking the letter is from AshLee?

    I vote Lesley for the next Bachelorette, I love her humor on Twitter.

  62. Chrissy says:

    Lauren and It’s Only a Game!…..It drives me crazy how they refer to Sean as “this man”!!! You guys are right….no one talks that way!!

  63. Chrissy says:

    Are Emily and Jef still together? Could “the letter” be from her? Most likely not but you never know with this show :)

  64. Lyla says:

    I just want to puke every time they show Sean kissing because he leads with the tongue hanging out. Really man…don’t do that again! Just saying!
    I am so over any attraction that may have ever been there. The man bores me to tears and he tells all the women things to make them think they are the one!

  65. Juno says:

    Oh, now here’s a great idea. If Sean picks Catherine and then they break up shortly thereafter, as usual, maybe Catherine and Ames can meet up at one of the Bachelor events. Now that would be a wedding I might even watch!

  66. Cil says:

    I don’t think the letter is from Sean’s mom. The brief image they show, the handwriting is very frilly, girlie-girl–not the handwriting of a middle-aged woman.

  67. Natty from Oz says:

    I think the letter is from one of the final two on how much they love him????

    Or Des saying what a huge mistake he made???

    Or Ashlee telling to be very very careful lol

    Or Tierra telling him she’s had corrective eyebrow surgery could they try again????

    ;-)

  68. Dorothy Mantooth says:

    I think Ashlee’s kiss of death was when she told Sean the exact cut and style of ring she wanted. Yikes, not smart Ash, not smart. Perhaps she’ll be the next Bachelorette though as a consolation prize.

    I don’t have an official team this season – I like certain things about both Lindsay and Catherine so I won’t be shocked either way.

    Maybe its part of the lingo out in Seattle, but I cringe when Catherine calls him “hunky” and “beefy.” What is up with that?

  69. Emily says:

    Faves: I don’t speak baby talk and her eyes turned into daggers. Seriously funny.

  70. BeachGal says:

    Lincee! Awesome recap – as always….feeding family of monkeys, Arie in the race track bar, baby talk, so much funny!

    The baby talk is totally pushing me over the edge. I could not watch it if Lindsay is our next Bach-ette.

    AshLee is SO overyly dramatic with the emotionalism over Sean. I get the rejection stuff – but the boiling bunny comment was a little too spot on!

    Team Catherine for sure. I think he has kissed her more on the forehead, etc… than any of the other girls throughout the entire season. Like he can’t get enough of her. Of course, ABC trickery can do anything….

  71. BeachGal says:

    Oh! I’m guessing the letter is from the girl he sent home right before Des. The one who ‘might have stayed if she had opened up’. I’m thinkin it’s not as big of a whoop-dee-doo as they are making it out to be.

    But I think the idea of the letter being from his mom is freakin hilarious!!

  72. Annie says:

    I liked Lesley from D.C. the best, she was funny and witty, hope she’s the next Bachelorette. The tierra episode(s) made me think about how much of a pressure cooker it must be to be on the show. NOT a normal situation. You’d have to have a certain kind of temperament to make it through with some equanimity. I couldn’t do it!

    Why on earth would AshLee volunteer her ring type/size unless she was really sure of herself? I wonder whether someone – ABC intern or producer, anyone? – prompted her. Or she was so much in la-la land OR Sean flat out told her she was the one/slept with her. She was so mad!

    I like Catherine better than Lindsey, but she may too smart/hip for Sean. Lindsey seems like an uncomplicated breeder ready to go. We’ll see. Thanks Lincee for your recap and providing this discussion forum!!!

  73. It's only a show! says:

    “Lindsey seems like an uncomplicated breeder ready to go”. Too funny!

  74. Delia says:

    Does anyone else remember previews with (presumably) Tierra saying, “Who made these cookies? They taste like [bleep]!” I never remember seeing this! I know some defend Tierra with bad editing, but this would seem like a genuine ‘not-nice person’ indicator.

    Annie– “Lindsey seems like an uncomplicated breeder ready to go.” is hilarious!!

  75. Hai Yen says:

    @Dorothy I’m from Seattle and those are absolutely not any terms we use to describe sexy men! I’m on Team Catherine but she sounds like a teen girl from 1995 when she calls Sean hunky. Although, I’m guessing it’s part of her weird sense of humor to use outdated terms, e.g. deliberately being a dork and saying sonething is groovy or far out.

    I have nothing more to say about Lindsay, I wish she had gone home many episodes ago.

    And while AshLee is the oldest contestant left, her describing her relationship with Sean in extreme and absolute clichés just exposes how naïve she is still. “There’s no two people on Earth meant to be together more than me and Sean.” “We are soulmates.” Maybe I’m too pragmatic, but these statements seemed insane to me in the context of a dating show! And how tacky to joke about what ring you want? I’m sure it’s how they edit it but the girl that is the most confident or assuming about the bachelor’s feelings is the one sent home.

    Also, why can’t they put more real conversations into the actual show vs just the last two minutes? I have really been enjoying getting a glimpse of these people talking about something else besides feelings and each other.

  76. hollygolightly says:

    Very glad he sent Ashlee packing…arm chair psychologist here but I think she set herself up for rejection from the get go with thinking/feeling he was the healer of all her pyschic trauma…

    Does anybody care to speculate on who writes SeanieSean the letter we see him reading in the previews of the final rose dealie? We are meant to fear his pick is giving him the blowoff, but I think it’s a letter from Des or Emily or maybe even his sister.

  77. hj says:

    I like Catherine best (although not necessarily for Sean).

    But, in the past, the people that actually got engaged and married were the baby talkers! Mesnick & Molly baby talked, Ashley & JP baby talked, and Trista was the queen of baby talk. We can all gag but Lindsay and Sean might have the best chances if baby talking = a successful Bachelor relationship. (Gag!)

  78. Allison says:

    Did anyone else notice that AshLee looked topless when they were smooching in the water on the private beach?

  79. Bev says:

    Your post was hilarious! Thanks for your commentary. Team Catherine!

  80. Tara says:

    I think Sean was a big douche in this episode. He told each of the girls he could see himself marrying them, knowing full well he’d be letting at least two of them go. Playing with their minds and hearts isn’t cool. I have never really seen what everyone thinks is so great about him, anyway, so I might be a bit biased. ;)

    I think it’s fair to remember that AshLee was a foster child until she was four years old. I know adult adoptees who, though they love their adoptive parents, never ‘got over’ being rejected by their biological parents and have had problems with trust and feelings of abandonment their entire lives. That’s not something you just ‘get over,’ even with therapy. Sean supposedly cared so much for Sarah’s feelings that he let her go before the rose ceremony, but totally played with AshLee’s head and let her think she actually had a chance. He’s a jerk and I kind of feel sorry for the girl who “wins” because she’ll be stuck with that selfish jackass…for at least six months until the contract with ABC runs out.

  81. Saggleo says:

    Allison -YES!! I noticed that too! Thanks for saying it much better than I tried too! LOL I rewound that like 4 times because I thought I was aeeing things, and though her top was on the thin/slim design side, I never saw it in that scene. Would really explain the reaction later even more so I think.

  82. Fan in AZ says:

    hj, interesting point I had never considered… and you forgot to mention Groban and Courtney ALSO baby talked together!

  83. EmLuweez says:

    Love, love, love everything here. Might sound obvious but it’s truly entertaining from Lincee to the end of the posts.

    I have to mention how I squirmed in supreme cringe-mode watching Sean sticking his tongue down into Catherine’s mouth. I know even describing it makes it sound gross! My husband laughed out loud as I sat there with both hands up covering my eyes but, of course, peeking through my fingers unable to avoid watching the train-wreck-of-a-make out-session!

    Through the whole season he has proven how inept he is at kissing: from refusing to turn his head, to the top lip pecking and now to this utterly awful progression. I mean, why else have Arie show up on Ep 1?? Everyone knew Sean couldn’t kiss!!!!! Except him……

  84. CakesOnAPlane says:

    I’m sorry, I thought I was reading a HILARIOUS and fun blog about the Bachelor, and suddenly some commenter named Jill is trying to convert me to Christianity. Can we just have fun making fun of these saps without trying to evangelize each other???

  85. Jersey Girls Don't Pump Their own Gas says:

    Did anyone hear the rumor that Emily M. may be asked to be the bachelorette again?

    I think she is so dull and hiding another person in there (wadk a doo) because how could someone who looks like she does not be able to maintain a stable relationship?

  86. Jersey Girls Don't Pump Their own Gas says:

    wack a doo

  87. Carol says:

    Did Sean not promise AshLee’s dad that he would not break her heart? I think he did, and if so, I don’t know how he can still feel good about his character that he values so much. Every season I say that his is the meanest show, and it is, but I keep watching! Can you imagine being so in love and feeling you’ve met your soul mate just to be sent off never to see him again?

  88. Danielle says:

    CakesOnAPlane: I don’t see why you can’t continue to enjoy Lincee’s awesome blog. I think you need to reread Jill’s post. She is not trying to convert anyone, just commenting on the fact that both AshLee and Sean are Christians and that she put way too much pressure on Sean to “complete” her.

  89. Kelly P says:

    I’m with some of the others on here who say that he missed his match when he let Des go. She was the best combo of silly and serious. She laughed at his prank, and even pulled one on him. AND she was able to express herself like an adult. They would’ve lived halfway across the country from the nutball brother anyway. I think we are looking at another Bachelor failed relationship in the making.

  90. MeanGene says:

    Desiree was was ALWAYS my favourite! I don’t want Desiree for next the Bachelorette. I want her for meeeee! Barring that, then, OK, the next Bachelorette! AshLee, as described by another bachelorette, is a control-freak and therefore guarantees a failed relationship and well, an unsatisfying conclusion – Just like Emily…

  91. CakesOnAPlane says:

    Danielle you are right in that I overreacted. It’s just that the Christian thing pops up so often on here that sometimes I’m not sure i’m in the right place. That and the “one and only relationship with Christ.” Well, I have a lot more significant relationships in my life than Christ (probably because I’m not Christian!) but she was probably (hopefully) talking to AshLee specifically.

    And you’re right, Lincee’s blog is GREAT!


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