Bachelor Peter Finale Recap 2: Good-Bye Barb
As I mentioned in the Part 1 Bachelor Peter Finale post, I feel that this season finale was fabricated hype, except when it comes to Barbara Weber.
And I thought we had seen the worst of Babs. Boy was I wrong.
Our Host Chris Harrison greets us from the studio and makes sure to point out Kelley (who is not pregnant), Uncle Neil with his jewelry briefcase, and Peter’s parental units looking forlorn. Well, Peter Sr. looked forlorn. Babs looked like she whittled the leg of her chair into a shiv to cut someone.
Someone named Madison.
Harrison shows us footage of Peter running through the desert and sitting on a rock reflecting. Probably about his shirt’s sleeve length. He looks like he’s mentally prepping for a prostate exam instead of an engagement.
Ironically, Hannah Ann’s disposition isn’t much better. She must be watching Grey’s Anatomy on Netflix and just finished the episode where Denny Duquette dies and Izzie can’t let go. It’s the only explanation as to why she’s so sad. Through tears, she puts on her white satin shift dress with a slit up to her hip and trudges to the car where producers make her wait thirty minutes so Chris Harrison can go tell Peter that he’s not sure if Hannah Ann is coming or not.
This is the infamous moment when Peter hyperventilates and takes to the bed with his head resting on a rolled up pair of jeans. Hare lets him sweat it out for a hot minute before delivering the “just kidding” line. Hannah Ann rolls up and says, “Hi Chris Harrison” before teetering her way down a million steps to get to her sort of boyfriend who she might maybe may marry.
Then Peter delivers the WORST proposal speech in the history of the world.
“I remember that first night. When I gave out the first impression rose. It was never a question who that was going to. I love all the memories we’ve been able to make. I’ve cherished every single moment. I know I told you that I was falling for you and my heart was torn in two different directions. Now I have to follow my heart so…Madison…”
At this moment, I almost swallowed my own tongue from the centripetal force of me sucking in air so fast that it almost choked me. I thought of Friends and how Ross said Rachel instead of Emily‘s name at the altar.
Do you think Madison was watching thinking, “Should I go up there?”
My bad. Peter just delivered his phrasing all wrong. There should be no pause behind the word “Madison.” Just say, “Madison left.” Or better yet, let’s keep the name of another woman out of the proposal all together.
Peter actually proposes. It looks forced. Hannah Ann says yes. It looks forced.
Peter: “She’s the most special girl in the entire world.
Lincee: “Second to Madison. And Babs.”
Peter flies back to LA and tells his family that he has made a decision. After ten minutes of stalling, he shares that Hannah Ann is THE ONE. Barb weeps at the news and pulls her boys in for a Weber Family Hug.
The next thing we know, the camera follows Hannah Ann to a rented out house that looks extremely familiar. Wait a minute! This is the same place where Arie broke up with Becca! On the yellow couch stained with her tears that she set on fire the next year!
This house will forever be known as “the breakup mansion.” All who enter should be ready for some bad news.
It’s been a month since they’ve seen each other, which seems weird. In a nutshell, Peter admits to Hannah Ann that his heart is still torn. He loves that she is all in, but he’s just not there. This is his truth.
Hannah Ann gives a speech about being a teammate and a partner and how she’s been right there for him since day one. She can’t believe he wasn’t up front with her from the beginning. How dare Peter steal a precious moment like an engagement if he wasn’t ready?
Peter claims he loves Hannah Ann and he never envisioned it to be this way. Hannah Ann gives him the ring, walks out of the room, and vows to never be with someone who is as torn and conflicted as Peter. THEY ARE DONE.
The audience members, including Babs, claps at Hannah Ann’s gumption. Read that sentence again. Babs cheers Hannah Ann for walking OUT of her son’s life.
How do I know? Because the geniuses over at ABC put a “Bab’s Cam” on the bottom left corner of the screen so we can watch her reactions. And eye rolls. And grimaces.
Back in the studio, Harrison brings Hannah Ann to the stage. Let me just say that Hannah Ann made a deal with the devil to look G-O-O-D. Red dress. Perfect makeup. Hair extensions. Side hug. Wink to Babs, who is once again clapping. What is going on?
Hannah Ann has one issue: Why didn’t Peter just tell her that he and Madison had “broken up” two days before the engagement? She claims she said yes without having all of the information. PS: He totally downplayed his feelings for Madi.
Peter’s defense? He thought his heart would get over Madi and eventually heal. It did not and now he’s upset that he didn’t fess up to Hannah Ann when he had the chance.
Hannah Ann goes on to say that she should have picked up on other clues. Exhibit A: The fact that he reached out to Hannah Brown to get closure (what???). “I guess there were three women involved in our engagement.”
Four if you count Barb.
In other meddling news, Our Host Chris Harrison takes it upon himself to fly to Auburn to ask Madison if she is still in love with Peter. This is tricky territory, so Madison answers that she would do things different if presented the same situation.
Harrison dramatically relays the message that Peter got engaged and that he has no idea Harrison is in Alabama. And the reason he is there is to tell Madison that Peter is single. He has ended his engagement with Hannah Ann.
Stone cold, Harrison. Way to bury the lead.
Then Harrison tells Madi that Peter ended his engagement because he still loves her. He believes Peter’s dream is to be with Madison. This is Madison’s second chance. Will she take it?
WHAT IS HAPPENING?
I guess Harrison’s new role, other than Our Host, is resident advisor.
Madison packs a bag, flies to LA, and scares the bejesus out of Peter as he awkwardly stands by a pool. He wants to know why she’s there? It’s a great question that is never answered. Both say that they still have feelings for each other. And that’s about it.
Once again, we see Peter and Harrison in the studio. Hare asks Pete, “Are you in love with Madison?” We get a halfhearted “yeah” from Peter and what can only be described as a sneer from his mother on the Bab Cam.
Madison traipses out onto the stage in a hot pink dress, bypassing Harrison to hug Peter. Guess what? They are in love! Now before you point fingers at Babs and shout, “neener, neener, neener” Harrison wants to remind you that we still don’t know how this journey ends.
Peter admits that they both have strong feelings for each other. The word “love” was tossed around a few times. He wants to be smart with this second chance, so they are going to take it one day at a time. It will be hard. They will have obstacles. The new journey will be all uphill. But they are ready to try.
Sadly, they forgot to tell their faces they are ready to try. Both look miserable.
Harrison invites Babs to share her feelings, which is when the spark is ignited in the dumpster.
Why does Barb outright love Hannah Ann better than Madison? Because she embraced the family. Madison made them wait three whole hours before she came to visit them in Australia, which was the worst because they were experiencing some severe jet lag. Not to mention the fact that they didn’t get an apology. How rude!
In addition, when Barb asked Madison if she was “madly in love with her son,” Madison answered no. We did not see that on the final cut of the episode. Moreover, she told Babs that she would NOT accept a proposal. Of course she was going to cheer for Hannah Ann.
Any loving mother would want that for her son.
Madison defends herself in a classy way. She begins by reminding everyone that “a lot is out of my control” which is code for “the producers made me sit on a bench outside and discuss my love life for three hours.” She came into the journey promising to be unashamed and undeniably herself, which she did by admitting her feelings toward fantasy suites.
Madison: “I’m not a mom. I don’t know what it’s like. But I know that I have love and respect for Peter, therefore I have love and respect for Peter’s family.”
Sadly, Madison has to ask Peter, “What do you think?” because he’s been a bump on a log for the past thirty minutes. Peter claims his family has his best interest at heart. The passion comes from a place of love. Then he asks his family to trust him because he loves this woman.
Babs chimes in again, this time digging her dagger a little deeper into Madison’s heart. Madison and Hannah Ann are two completely different people. One was willing to compromise. One was not. He gave his heart to two people and only one girl gave her heart to him.
Madison speaks up for herself again. This is her journey, too. It’s not just Peter choosing her, but her choosing Peter.
Harrison feels that he is losing his grip a bit, so he unwisely asks Barb, “how do we turn the page” expecting her to give a token, generic answer about wishing for the best or love conquering all. Instead, Barb twists the knife.
Babs: “He’s going to have to fail to succeed. Everyone who knows him knows that it is not going to work.”
What. The. Sam. Hell.
Could we not get a tag onto the end of that sentence? Perhaps, “We love our son and support him though…” or “Madison is great.” Nope.
Madison looks like the wind has been knocked out of her lungs. Peter says nothing.
Harrison tosses some gasoline on this unexpected fire and asks Pete Sr. how he feels? Babs whispers something in Spanish to him. Naturally, the Twitterverse was ALL OVER IT and I learned that she said, “Say something bad. Help me.”
Again. What. The. Sam. Hell.
Pete Sr. rambles on about obstacles and how the beginning of a relationship is supposed to be bright, but there are too many differences they will have to overcome.
Our bachelor finally asks his parents to accept Madison. He loves her and that should be enough. He’s rewarded by a scowl from his mother and a blank stare from his father. Harrison tries to put a Band-Aid on this situation, but it’s too severe. It’s like Peter’s head wound all over again.
Praise the good Lord Peter didn’t get down on one knee and propose to this woman. With Uncle Neil sitting in the audience with his briefcase full of engagement rings, which will inevitably be returned to him, I was nervous.
And there you have it. Madison looks beat down. Babs is all up in our new bachelorette Clare’s grill for some reason, hugging her like she’s a future daughter-in-law. And although I’m positive Peter will defend his mother with every last breath, her behavior definitely scarred their relationship.
Can Madison overlook the Webers’ distain for her in order to make it work with Peter? Will Peter be able to forgive his mother for embarrassing the woman he loves on national television? Will Babs force Madison to eat at the kids’ table at Thanksgiving while she cuts the fatty parts off her son’s meat in the dining room?
We shall see if love conquers all.