Except when you live in the country, you might find other things.

You see at my parents’ house, the ice cold drinks are nestled up against Styrofoam containers of bait.  That’s right people.  Worms are living next to the Diet Pepsi and whatever mystery is hiding in the orange Tupperware container from 1975.

Which reminds me…does anyone from the south drink Diet Pepsi?  No.  But my Mama does.  We don’t know why.  If she could buy Tab in bulk, I’m sure she would.  And I can guarantee she wishes the Diet 7Up was Fresca.

And why is the lemon icebox pie BEHIND the worms?  Seriously?  Can’t we put it on the empty shelf below and move the SECOND crate of worms up top with the tainted caffeine?

This picture is just all sorts of wrong.  And that includes the fact that the Dr Pepper seems to be missing even though Diet Pepsi is annoyingly abundant.  Heaven forbid that I drink water at the realization.  I’m pretty sure I washed the lemon pie down with a banana daiquiri.

It’s important to stay healthy and get four to six servings of fruit daily.

I knew my sister truly loved me when she tortured her kid in order to capture a video that pimps out my website.  This makes up for the time she dropped my Strawberry Shortcake doll from the upstairs balcony.

Two best parts in this video of my niece:
1. How she airs her tongue out because the taste is so nasty.
2. My sister laughing hysterically in the background.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Take a look:

It doesn’t get more clear than that folks.  Green beans are evil. 

Walker is so smart to recognize this when his taste buds are so young.  He’s also a rock star when it comes to other things.  Like fighting cancer. 

About four months ago, I received a Facebook message from Walker’s parents.  Missy and Chad informed us that their precious little boy had been diagnosed with a malignant Rhabdoid Tumor. 

The strength that Missy, Chad and their immediate family all possess is humbling to read.  As I complain daily about about how my knee hurts when I bend it, they are faithful that God’s plan for Walker’s life is a perfect one and are prayerful that He will perform a miracle on his little body.

When this YouTube clip was included in Missy’s latest update, I emailed her and basically said she was not expressing true Pi Phi sisterhood qualities if she didn’t let me post it on my website. 

Her only request was that I include their family website so others could be encouraged by Walker’s amazing story. 

See what I mean?  They choose to be faithful.  They choose to fight.  That’s their family way. 

Please feel free to visit www.prayforwalker.com and read about story.  Prepare to be inspired. 

And let’s all send up a little prayer for Walker…my green bean hatin’ buddy!

My Mama LOVES Elvis Presley. In honor of her being his biggest fan, I’ve included her favorite Elvis moment of all time.

The King + a tight, white bedazzled jumpsuit + the cool instrumental opening + Hawaii = GREATNESS!

We decided we needed a little music to help us with our chores.  Their TV has that section of the guide where you can choose from 500 different music channels.  An avid believer of NO CHRISTMAS MUSIC BEFORE THANKSGIVING, my Dad turned it to the only channel he knew by heart — classic country.

We were humming along to Waylon, Willie, Johnny and George.  And then an old favorite by Holly Dunn came on…”Daddy’s Hands.”

I always thought that song was so sweet.  Because it’s exactly how I remember my Daddy’s hands.  I was sort of tearing up when I turned to look at my Daddy at that moment to watch his hands.

He was picking his nose.

The song will never be the same.  And I think that is awesome!

Especially my 93-year-old grandmother. 

Me:  “Hi Mimi!  You look so pretty in purple!”

Mimi:  “Thank you honey.  You look good too.  Have you lost weight?”

Me:  “I have!  Thanks for noticing!”

Mimi:  “I thought so.  You looked a little porky at the re-enactment a few months ago.”

Needless to say, I skipped the lemon icebox pie for dessert.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!

You may know Vince as the morbidly obese man from last season of “House.”  He also won an Emmy for his role as a serial killer from an 80′s thing.

The movie is “Cameraman.”  Make sure to see it and support SGT Cole’s future trust fund so he can lend me enough money to write my award-winning book that allows me to travel the world, meet all the Green Beaners and sit in Ellen’s guest chair.  She will fall in love with my quit whit and stellar sense of humor and make it her life goal to find me a man that can make me laugh for the rest of my life.

Clearly, my future happiness is in your hands.  DON’T BLOW IT.

Happy Veteran’s Day Daddy.  I’m so proud that you served our country in Vietnam.  I love you!

(Please feel free to remember loved ones serving in the military by leaving an encouraging word in the comments section.)

Finally, I suggested the only thing I knew that would work under the time crunch.

Lincee:  “We could recycle my costume from last year if you are interested.”

Jamie:  “I was hoping you’d say that.”

A few snips, tucks and modifications, and we were ready for trick-or-treating.

Her face is red and splotchy because she HATED the tulle.  She pitched the biggest fit of her life when we plopped her into the bath tub.  Thank the Lord for that rubber ducky. 

My Mother and I kept telling her that if she expects to be a treasured member of this family, she better get used to tulle.  And sequins.  And fringe.  And movie musicals.  And large bows on her bald head.

Because that is who we are.  Embrace it Addison.  It’s in your blood.

We’ve been waiting and waiting for my niece to sit up on her own, and she finally did!  It’s a milestone that should be celebrated with a fun new outfit.  And everyone knows that nothing says team spirit like an embroidered onesie and a matching tutu.  Go Lobos!

Of course this lasted five seconds before she started eating the tutu.  But to her defense, we were playing dress up right around lunch time.

Then she decided she wanted to eat the camera and we figured we were done.

I’m a little worried about a Halloween outfit.  When your Mom’s a drill team director and you wear tutus on a regular basis, there is a bit of pressure when it comes to costume options. 

My vote is for a cupcake because I could just eat her up!