iHateGreenBeans

Prepare yourself for mayhem. This is going to be a random post, so stay with me people. We’ve got a lot to cover and I have a short amount of time. I’m not naming names, but someone has an article due by end of day tomorrow all she can think about is how an entire 48-hours has gone by without discussing this:

I know. I know. There really are no words. But if I had to choose one or two that immediately came to mind, they would be Chach and pineapple. I’m just saying.

2. Do you beLEEve?

I truly believe that Mama Sox would have experienced a nervous breakdown had she been the new cog in the well-oiled American Idol machine. Sweet little Lee from the paint shop had zero chance to land a contract after he totally choked on Tuesday night. Crystal is going to be fine. Someone smart and talented will whip Lee into shape as soon as he removes all 9 million pieces of confetti from his hair and wardrobe.

Due to aforementioned time constraints, I’ll sum up the rest of the night with a beta cap:

School girl skirt wearing, Alice cooper eyelining, KRIS ALLEN emoting, Brother’s Gibb snoozing, Lincee fast forwarding, Big Mike waving, Big Mike dramatizing, Lincee fast forwarding, Dane Cook embarrassing, Simon fun poking, top 9 women belting, Christina Aguilera balladeering, Lincee clapping, Lincee iTune purchasing, top 6 men Hall and Oating, Lincee fast forwarding, Crystal and Alanis wandering, “You Oughtta Knowing”, Lincee loudly singing, Lincee rewinding, Lincee again singing, Carrie Underwood u-u-u-u-u-u-undoing, Lincee clapping, Lincee iTunes purchasing, Casey James bleeting, awesome song ruining, Brett Michaels appearing, awesome song rejuvenating, Lee and Chicago collaborating, Lincee fast forwarding, Pants on the Grounding, Lincee’s eyes rolling, Lincee fast forwarding, Idol past winner gathering, Lincee fist pumping, Miss Jackson lip syncing, uncomfortable Joe Cockering, Crystal freakin’ rocking, Paul Abdul looking stunning and Lee DeWyze winning.

3. Ga-Ga Glee
Finn pulling off a red leather shower curtain to make his Lady Ga Ga costume was hot. Hey. He’s like 35 in real life or something. Don’t judge.

4. So You Think You Can Dance?
I KNOW I can dance. Pay no attention to the attractive scars on my knee. It’s a shark bite. The story is riveting. I’ll tell you one day.

My favorite show of all time is coming back TONIGHT! Set your DVRs!

Sound off in the comments section. What did you think about Jake and Vienna? Was ABC serious or poking fun? Any recommendations on how to get that image out of my head? Was Lee the true winner of AI? Was Ga Ga Glee one of your favorites? Or is Madonna still the best episode to date? Anyone know anything about fast moving land rigs? I only need 1,500 words. Help.

Let the record show that sweet, adorable Christopher J. Hanke will always be my favorite Broadway baby.

But since he’s off making movies and starring in television shows now,  I think it’s okay to add a few more guys to my theater swoon list.

I saw Hair this weekend in New York City.

How have we not talked about this?

Allow me introduce you to Kyle Riabko and Ace Young.

The show was really good. Ace Young’s abs were VERY NICE. And I am too much of a lady to comment on the nudity. In fact, I almost missed the nudity because I wasn’t paying attention. And when I did realize all the nakedness, I got embarrassed and looked away. But that’s neither here nor there. We’re talking about Kyle’s voice and Ace’s abs.

Both stellar.

At the end of the show, the audience is invited up to the stage to dance with the hippies.  As I’m trying to figure out the best route to get down there in order to inspect Abe’s abs up close and personal, he was there.  In front of me.  Three rows ahead.  Hugging the entire front row of the balcony.

It was sort of like the time Jordan was two rows up in front of me at the New Kids on the Block concert (last year) and I couldn’t move because I was transfixed by the awesomeness.

So there’s Ace.  Hugging people.  And I’m standing there.  My friend Nancy Jane punches me into reality and I start making my way down to get a free hug from the hippie.  But then he ran off through a curtain and I was sad.

Fortunately, I will always have his abs burned in my memory.

Good times.

If you are living in NYC or planning to go visit the Big Apple (and optional on-stage peen doesn’t bother you) I suggest you see this show.

And make sure you sit on the front row of the mezzanine section.

I’ve decided to start a new category that will further be known as “How Have We Not Talked About This?” 

As you all know, I have a real job and it sometimes gets in the way of me sharing my rambling and opinions about nothing as much as I would like.  Not that I’m complaining…several of my best posts are direct results of things I experience while on the job.  See here, here and here.

With that said, days…weeks…even months may go by and one day I realize that we’ve never discussed something or someone in pop culture that was newsworthy enough to stop me in my tracks and take notice.

Case in point? 

Glee.

How have we not talked about this?

I must have been in their perfect demographic range or something, because I was intrigued the minute FOX started pimping out this new show about Glee Club during American Idol commercial breaks.  In fact, I was so much the perfect demo, that I stopped my DVR in the middle of fast forwarding because I spotted something that looked to be musical theater. 

Oh how I love musical theater.  Although Hallsville High School did not have a Glee Club, the theater department did perform musicals each fall.  I’ll have you know that you are currently reading the words of Cha Cha Digregorio…the best dancer at St. Bernadette’s.  I’m just saying.

Since I was watching the season finale of American Idol live, I was delighted to find out that Glee debuted immediately following. 

It’s your typical high school storyline:  Teacher was Glee back in the day and wants to resurrect it.  Drama queen, diva girl, weird girl, nerd and gay guy are the only ones that sign-up.  Teacher hears football star singing in the shower after practice one day and tricks him into signing up.  (Of course, it turns out he begins to secretly loves Glee and wonders how this will go over with his buddies on the team.) 

I have to admit, it was a slow start for me.  But I stuck with it.  And this was the pièce de résistance.

Don’t stop believing in this show people.