Maks in salmon and Ali’s promo: ABC at its finest

The Dancing with the Stars opener shoved us down memory lane reminding us of last week’s booting of Captain Twinkle Toes and how he refuses to go on national TV without crying.  Someone brilliant in the graphics department super imposed the picture of a single rose over his head that graphically beat him to the ground as he’s thanking his fans in Canada for voting.

I laughed.  Out loud.  Some intern is being fired right now, but it was worth it.  Note to intern:  Kudos to you man.  Call me.  I’m in the creative business.  I like people like you.  You’re funny with just a dash of sarcasm.  You will go far my friend.  Live long and prosper.

Here are a few things we learned on tonight’s show:

1.  Maks can make the color salmon look manly and hot.

2.  Evan has the sweetest spirit and is adorable.  And I love AHna too.

3.  Group dances with the “stars” and their pro partners are lame.

4.  According to the Bachelorette promo, Ali is ready to find love.

I say pick the dude who does a back flip off of the limo about halfway through the commercial.

What do you say readers? Were we really shocked when she fake cried in the hotel lobby, flung herself to the ground and shouted, “Whyyyyyyyy?????” to the ceiling? Did America really hate that she didn’t get a second chance with Jake? Do you think she watched DWTS and conclude that Jake is a total tool bag? How can Maks wear a salmon tuxedo and still be so hot?

My inquiring mind wants to know.

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