Survey says?

Most of you know that I worked at Disney World back in the day.   I was a Jungle Cruise skipper and our “back stage” connected to the “back stage” area of Pirates of the Caribbean.  Skippers and Pirates often cross trained, so we all friends or at least knew of each other.  (I mean…EVERYONE wanted to be a Pirate or Skipper.)

There were many things that I learned while working at Disney World that sort of ruined the magic for me.  I saw Cinderella kiss a girl.  Not that there’s anything wrong with that.  But still…weird.  Saw Snow White smoking with Dopey.  I even heard, but can not confirm, that children’s laughter is piped into the Magic Kingdom.

And then there are the people who do the dirty on the long rides (if you know what I mean.)  These bold individuals typically choose to get down on It’s a Small World and Pirates.  Traditionally, if any guests of Walt Disney World are caught in compromising positions, they are asked to leave the Kingdom and never return.

Naturally, the Pirates did not follow this guideline.  Instead, they opted for a more creative way to let the rule breakers know…that we knew…of their sin.

You see, all throughout the Pirate ride, there are hidden cameras.  There is a tower that is set up much like Mission Control at NASA where one Pirate sits and makes sure people behave themselves.  When said Pirate discovers a couple being naughty in the boat, does he call on his radio to make sure security is there to escort the duo out of Adventureland?

Nope.

Instead, he calls his Pirate buddies and they rush to the exit in order to hold up signs with numbers on them.  Think Olympics.  Most of the time the numbers are pretty descent and the scores are in the higher range because it took guts to do what those people just did.  And kicking them out FOREVER from the Magic Kingdom is a bit harsh.  We’ll settle for sheer embarrassment.

So why am I telling you this?

I feel like I need to implement the same method for the newlyweds who just moved in upstairs about a month ago.

Is it tacky to leave a can of WD-4o in front of their door?  And do you think they would know what I meant if I left a sign that said, “9.5” on white poster board?

I had to take off a half a point for the dismount.

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15 Comments on "Survey says?"

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SGT Cole
SGT Cole

I’m going to the San Antonio zoo tomorrow morning. I’ve got my eye on the aquarium, but I think the gf is partial to the monkeys. I’ll let you know.

Sandy
Sandy

I laughed harder at this post than any other…what does that say about me?

CeeCee
CeeCee

Sandy, I’m right there with you!!! Too funny- and yet I feel your pain Lincee. I lived in an apartment years ago with beautiful hardwood floors and NO soundproofing. I couldn’t look that neighbor directly in the eye ever again! Thankfully I moved shortly after his, um, brief encounter. Lolol!

SC
SC

I would love to hear more about these behind-the-scene Disney facts! So funny!

Brandy
Brandy

That is so funny Lincee! I would totally leave the can of WD-40 with a little note that says, “Please take care of the squeaking.” That would be hilarious and might take care of the problem. Plus, they would probably never know it was you, so no harm done. 🙂

Aunt B
Aunt B

I would opt for the 145-piece bedroom set…..a gross of rubbers AND a can of WD-40…..then FOR SURE they would get the hint AND never be able to muster a hello to you….that’s just my warped sense of humor.

Kak
Kak

Ok, I can’t imagine this. Pirates of the Caribean ride? Its a small world? There are multiple ppl in the same boat on those rides. How can they even believe that no one (except hidden cameras) could see? I would have bet on the Haunted mansion where the cars are for two. Ewwww. And yes, WD-40 would do it.

Chickpea
Chickpea

ROFL! Thanks for “sharing”!!! :o)

Andi
Andi

I just snorted! Thanks for the laughs!!! 🙂

P.S. Did yall see that Shayne Lamas was arrested for a DWI over the weekend!

smurphy
smurphy

I would definitely go for the Olympic scorecard system — that would be too funny!

Courtney

That’s the worst…I had neighbors above me that were very, um, vocal when doing the deed. Good luck…I think the can of WD-40 would be a good start. And I’m with Kak…aren’t there multiple families on both of those rides?

Courtney
Courtney

Funny…you bring this up…I was woken up this morning at 4:15am by my neighbors next to me with a squeaky bed that hits the wall…..I proceeded to leave a note on their door stating that their neighbors did not appreacite being woken up at 4:15 to be an audience to their monkey antics and that maybe they should learn to get in to mood during business hours….. 🙂

saggleo
saggleo

ROFLMAO!!! I feel for ya Lincee! There was a time I lived between two newlyweds…so great to be on the second floor – NOT! The couple below moved a short while after….thank goodness.

Wow…watch out for Pirates! lol

SGT Cole
SGT Cole

So the zoo was a total bust in the whole “public sex” area. First of all, too many kids. Don’t want to scare them of course. Secondly, no semi-private areas. And strike three the monkeys were already doing things 5 times more shocking than what we had in mind.

Monkeys 1 – SGT Cole and GF 0.

Drew
Drew

In the immortal words of Avenue Q:

“You Can Be as Loud as the Hell You Want (When You’re Makin’ Love)”

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