Raise your hand if your head hurts from rolling your eyes while watching Bachelor in Paradise? Does anyone else feel like the ABC Psychotherapist needs to intervene? We have some serious issues bubbling over in the various nooks and crannies of the resort and I’m mixture of bored and sad. I’m borad. Someone hysterical goes home. Seven people cry. JJ spouts metaphors like a Lit professor at the local JuCo.
There were tears. There was an overwhelming sense of ickyness. There was an impeccable host in a pink shirt. And at the end of the day, there was the bachelorette standing next to a man near a swimming pool with royal blue water. Kaitlyn made her choice. Skinny jeans are not in her future. As he always does, Gosling got the girl. The girl got the wraparound porch with blue
This looks like a bachelorette who has a very tough decision ahead of her. Should she go for the adventurous life in which her days will be filled with shopping for skinny jeans and rambunctious romps against church archways? Or should she choose a more private life full of row boats, wood shavings in the barn and frequent one-sided conversations about someone’s control issues? It’s time to vote!
Everyone knows that The Bachelorette Men Tell All episode is notoriously boring. Quite honestly, ninety percent of the show could easily be watered down into a tidy 20-minute segment. Of course Mike Fleiss would rather saw off an appendage before he let that happen, so it’s up to me to filter through all of the trips down Memory Lane and omit the superfluous outbursts from that random guy on the
It’s been a weird season of The Bachelorette. Suitors are walking out willy nilly, boutonnieres are left to wilt on the Home Depot pedestal, rose ceremonies are never at the end of the show anymore, statement rings are multiplying like Kaitlyn’s tears and I’m pretty sure Ireland is ready for the ABC production team to polish off their last Guinness before hopping into a paddy-wagon bound for the airport. Because
