Tag Funny Bachelor recap

Bachelorette Hannah Recap: Finding Mr. Right

We live in a world where a woman’s journey to find love is inaugurated by a few drag queens cat calling eight men who have agreed to wear man panties on national television in order to be crowned Mr. Right. Some say it’s strange. I call it “Monday Night.” Hannah’s crop of dudes are an interesting bunch. Never in my fifteen seasons of recapping The Bachelorette have I been more

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Bachelor Colton Finale: Colton has a girlfriend and we have a bachelorette!

It was touch and go there for a while during the two hour FINAL season finale of Bachelor Colton’s journey to find a wife. Sure he settled for a girlfriend, but there was all sorts of drama, according to Our Host Chris Harrison, that led to Colton’s decision to be cool with a girl who doesn’t really like him that way but is willing to travel around the continental US

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Bachelor Colton Recap: Hometown Etiquette

It’s an important week and Colton knows it. He spends a little more time in the shower, soaping up his chest while contemplating how weird it is that a cameraman is peeping through the glass. A quick glance in the mirror confirms that Colton is ready. He musks up, packs a tiny overnight bag, and heads to Virginia to begin his cross-country journey to figure out which family he wants

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Bachelor Colton Recap: Dropping Like Flies

Hello friends! When we last left Colton, he was wandering up and down the seashore trying to remember all the reasons he agreed to be the bachelor. There’s the InstaFame, dating up to twenty-five women at one time, perhaps finding a wife, the swiping of his v-card, cool clothes, stamps in his passport, and being best friends with Ellen and Jimmy Kimmel. What he didn’t expect was the catty drama,

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Bachelor Colton Recap: Yo ho

I have to hand it to The Bachelor. After twenty-seven seasons, you’d think we would have showcased a pageant scandal on the franchise, but no. Mike Fleiss had to search near and far to find two best friend former beauty queens, willing to go on national television to unleash their inner beasts. And let us not forget the teeny tiny pirate wench who doesn’t want to be associated with the

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