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The most dramatic season ever

Thursday, January 3, 2013 @ 10:01 AM
Author: Lincee

There’s roller derby.
Where’s Harrison?
I spy a neck brace.
An old boyfriend comes to get his girl back.
Sean symbolically drops the rose from a balcony.
Awkward kissing.
MONKEY ON A BEACH!
So many tears.
Petty arguing.
I’m resisting the urge to throw up a little in my mouth.

Yep. The Bachelor is back people. Get excited.

And could someone slap me on the head? My eyes seem to be stuck in the upward roll position. Thanks.

30 Responses to “The most dramatic season ever”

  1. This Show Makes Me Crazy says:

    At the beginning he says “there are so many beautiful women here” and then there is an echo in a woman’s voice “Beautiful!” What’s with that? I CAN’T WAIT!

  2. AmyA says:

    I clicked on the video just to see the monkey on the beach! I’m afraid I’ll have to fix my own upwardly-rolled eyes before I can un-stick yours! As silly as I find this over-dramatized train wreck, we all know I’m probably going to watch.

  3. Alison says:

    Oh good gravy! Where do they find these women???

  4. Courtney says:

    This show makes me want to break out in hives and throw the remote at the TV. Can someone please relay to them the definition of insanity? Goodness gracious.

  5. Kathy says:

    Oh My God, we have heard all of these lines in every other bachelor/ette season, but since Sean is so hot, you know I’ll be watching! Let the “amazing” and “journey” counts begin!!

  6. Bethe says:

    Why is there an ambulance in EVERY SINGLE SEASON? Is it in their contract?

    I think they brought out the crazies because Sean, while probably a wonderful guy in real life, is BORING in TV life. Bless his heart.

    I can’t wait to watch.

  7. Liana says:

    Welcome back Lincee and Happy New Year! Can’t wait until next Monday for another season of OMGs and cheesy dialogs. Of course your Tuesday posts are much anticipated.

  8. KnoxGirl says:

    Oh Boy. I cant be sure, but I think the trouble maker girl is a short person (or possibly an elf). Not that there is anything wrong with that. Not everyone can reach 5′ 1″.

  9. BeachGal says:

    I *think* he might be smirking while looking on at the girl with a neck brace! TRAIN WRECK. Can. Not. Wait. (to look at Sean for 10 weeks!!) ;)

  10. BeachGal says:

    I wish there was a way to ‘Like’ other people’s comments like on fb…cause KnoxGirl – the elf comment is just downright funny. And I’m only 5’2″!! ha!!

  11. Saggleo says:

    What AmyA and KnoxGirl said!!! LMAO!!

    Happy New Year Lincee and green beaners!

  12. Love From Utah says:

    I’ve missed “The Bachelor,” but not nearly as much as I’ve missed you, Lincee!!

  13. 77%gay says:

    Looks like it will be a blast. Cant wait, me and my boyfriend love this show and so do other friends of mine in the gay community I am with.
    I am wondering if Sean will have sex with the girls when on the fantasy dates? He seems very serious and religious and post on Twitter bible verses and stuff. Hope we dont get too much of the Puritanism this season, last season with Emily was just too much to endure, all that fake holy facade crap.
    Anyway when will they do a gay Bachelor? That would be awesome!

  14. 77%gay says:

    I think the short girl is named Lyndsey Yenter, it is reported on a site when she made a date in Mountaina by bystanders that she is really short like 5″2″. He dad is a 2 star General in the Army also. I seen a preview on youtube with her talking the 1st night to Sean, she wanted him to kiss her, she seemed drunk, and seems like a real firecracker. I’ll bet she is trouble!!

  15. Lass says:

    Can’t wait for the tears, secret whispers, the ambulance, the monkey, hot tubs, bitchiness and of course Sean’s hot abs & arms! Winning!

  16. ILG says:

    Excited The Bachelor is back so I can read your posts, Lincee!

    I really think they just try to top the season before by bringing even more crazy people in each time. There must be a way to test the craziness in their auditions.

    I think the bachelor or bachelorette has an idea of who the top 4 will be on the first night. Of course they can’t let us know that, but surely they can tell how crazy most of them are. Well…I say that, but Jake picking Vienna has always boggled my mind!

  17. Pat says:

    I think the bitchiest girl wins like on Groban’s season!

  18. Lori H says:

    Looking forward to train wreck TV, and most of all, Lincee’s recaps!! Happy New Year, y’all!

  19. Laura Lynn says:

    I have to tell you, the ONLY reason I watch anymore is so I can read your blog and have it all make sense. Looking forward to seeing what you have to say about this season! :)

  20. contrarian says:

    Greg Gutfeld, one of the co-hosts on “The Five” (5 p.m. on Fox News Channel), is compiling a list of banned phrases. I’d like to do the same for this show, although (of course) it will never happen:

    1. Fairytale…(many variations)
    2. Most amazing…(many variations)
    3. First time…(many variations)
    4. I can’t wait…(many variations)
    5. through 50….

    You get the the idea.

  21. VickiG says:

    I have my new pajamas and slippers laid out … can’t wait to get home and get ready for a new season of The Bach! Let the lunacy begin! Bring it on!

  22. renee says:

    This seems like the best season ever! I laughed out loud 3 times.

  23. Robyn :) says:

    I did not watch this clip, but sw the preview at the end of tonight’s episode and it looks like Sean will be pulling a Mesnick!!! With a rose in hand!

  24. Abby says:

    Tierra in the ambulance?? She looks like Deanna+Melissa Rycroft. Seriously. Came across so sweet at first but not in that preview! Also… KACIE B! I LOVE YOU!!

  25. Natty from Oz says:

    Oh my goodness….THIS is MY Christmas….new Bach AND Lincee’s blog….let the games begin!!!!

  26. Natty from Oz says:

    PS: I hope Sean’s learned how to kiss!!

    Also, one more phrase for the drinking game:

    Blah blah (insert idyllic world destination) is the perfect place to fall in love.

  27. Carrie says:

    And another crappy looking finale rose ceremony home depot stage thing. I think it’s getting worse and worse each year.

  28. Sarah says:

    LinC I have been reading this since the beginning…400 seasons ago…you know when it was sent around by email. You never cease to make me snort and pee just a little when I read ya. Cannot wait to see more of Shawn and his abs.

  29. Sarah says:

    LinC I have been reading this since the beginning…400 seasons ago…you know when it was sent around by email. You never cease to make me snort and pee just a little when I read ya. Cannot wait to see more of Shawn and his abs.

  30. Shannon says:

    Lincee,
    I have been reading your recaps since the early days on email – was such a thrill to get them & rapidly re-forward. Glad to have you back on board for another season. I’ll quit when you do (or when my brain actually rots like my hubby says it will by watching this delicious trash).
    Off to start Downton Abbey so I can keep up with the snark! Keep up this important work!!


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